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Are you comfortable talking about your sexual needs with your partner?

Suggestions of sex and sexuality infiltrate our lives in a variety of ways, from tv shows and movies to advertisements and social media. However, having a conversation about sex does not necessarily translate into pleasant discussions.

This is especially true when it comes to sex and what we desire from it. However, having good sex necessitates communication. An important skill is an openness to talk about the type of sex we have or wish to have. You and your partner's relationship can improve emotionally, psychologically, and mentally by having these discussions.

I want to broach this topic, but where do I start?

Realise that it’s never too late

It is best to begin talking about sex early in a relationship since the longer you wait, the more difficult it will become. Initiate simple talks about consent or contraception to build trust and intimacy with your partner. Then you both can gradually arrive at the mutual decision of what you want and don't want.

Begin by addressing some mild fantasies you have had in your mind to gauge your partner's reaction. This will aid in the development of trust and closeness. You have time if you're in a long-term relationship. Make sure your spouse understands their place in your wild or mild fantasies, so they are not left out on the topic.

Choosing the appropriate moment

While it may be tempting to have this conversation as soon as possible, it is essential to consider when and where the ideal time and location to discuss this is.

Try to talk about it at a time when you know there will be few distractions, and avoid doing so shortly before bedtime. It's not a good idea to talk about these issues before or after you have sex.

Explain with clarity

Understand what constitutes as turn-ons and turn-offs for you. If there is some way that your partnering is performing that isn't setting you in the mood or makes you feel off, it is best to address it as early as possible and thoroughly communicate your likes and dislikes.

Don't be surprised

You and your spouse must be on the same page, so have those discussions first before springing any shocks on them. Discuss your interests as well as any fantasies you may have. If you decide to include some of these into your relationship, do your homework jointly.

Know Your Sexual Personality

Knowing your "sexual style" might help you understand which kind of closeness you enjoy the most—and the same goes for your partner. Experiment with each other's sexual techniques.

Where should the dialogue take place?

It's best to keep sex talk out of the bedroom and other areas where you and your spouse are typically intimate. Try to think of a neutral location where you may discuss this.

Consider taking a stroll to a quiet location where you can chat quietly or sitting in a room other than your bedroom. Make sure there aren't any other people nearby since if someone else hears what you're saying, it can bring the conversation to an end.

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1 Comment

Maas Maas
Maas Maas
Sep 23, 2021

This is great. Love the insight. Many couples struggle with this surely.

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